You’ve probably heard the saying before – find your why – like all sayings, they tend to do the rounds for a while then fade away… for a while. When I thought about it the other day though, it seemed to take on a new resonance.
I had been thinking about how I want to lose some of the weight that I’ve gained since I started hormone replacement therapy to help my migraines. My arms and legs and face are all the same – but I’ve ended up with a “spare tire” which means my clothes either don’t fit or fit badly… It makes me feel sad and frumpy.
I really want to lose my “muffin top” that spills over the top of my jeans.
But after lecturing you all about “taming the dragon” and telling it to shush – I wasn’t doing a great job at it, AND I was also playing the “don’t hit the pole” game of focusing on the bad stuff – not the road ahead, not the skinny-jean version of me.
My “why” for going on walks or going to the gym (and I use the term ‘gym’ loosely) was – “lose my belly fat” – but what I probably should be doing, especially according to the “manifesting in blue ink” people – is that I should be making my why “be skinny-jinny-me” or “be healthy” or “be X weight”… focus on the solution not the problem.
I get it – BUT – my why really is “lose the bad” not “aim for the good” – I understand what I’m supposed to be focusing on and for what reasons – but it’s not the skinnier version of me that I think about in the morning when I get dressed… it’s the zip-rip-risking version of me that I see before me in the mirror.
I guess what I’m saying is… do as I say – not as I do.
Follow my advice, not my actions!
That said – when it comes to healing – you really DO need to be clear on your why – I’ve moved to “more joy” rather than “less pain” – but they’re both OK places to start… and as an answer to “why are you trying to heal?” they’re both better than “because…” Answers such as “to spend quality time with my kids” or “so I can walk the dogs more often” or “get myself overseas” are also great whys.
Find your why – think about what will make you motivated to change, to put in the effort, to break your current relationship with your position of “I’ve already tried everything” inertia.
What will it take for you to start to heal yourself?
WHY?
As always, take care lovelies, Linda xox
The Mindful Migraine 
Leave a comment